New Wal-Mart Dress Code
This just in:
1) Unless you are a porn star, lingerie should not be worn as outer wear.
2) Children should have shirts, shoes, and clean faces.
3) Do not dress in a style that is sluttier than that of your daughter, even if she's already got her own young-un'.
4) Feel free to show all the skin you like if you are ready for an Ironperson Triatholon. Otherwise, please cover flab and avoid garments that pull and stretch.
5) There is a difference between low income and low class. Please be aware of it.
6) Men younger than 20 may wear pants below their waist, and men older than 80 may wear pants up to their armpits. Men between the ages of 21 and 79 should strive to wear the waistband of the pants at their waist, real or perceived.
Thank you. Your co-operation will make the Wal-Mart shopping experience more pleasant for all.
posted by junebee @ 10:21 AM
10 comments
10 Comments:
You left out a couple.
Please keep teeth in place at all times.
Slippers are not acceptable footwear. If you need plastic tennis shoes, an associate will be happy to help you find the shoe department as soon as they finish handling money and then making your SubWay sandwich.
YeeeeHawwwww :)
I like to save money as much as the next person, so I grudgingly go to Wal-Mart (it's also closer than Tar-jay). I also have always been a proponent of "if you don't like it, don't look". But holy smokes, I went to Wal-Mart yesterday and everywhere I turned there was some sort of fashion horror. I mean, it was train-wreck-stop-and-stare bad.
I can't do it. I can't go to Wal-mart. I just can't. I hate the store. But I love your post!
I can't do the Walmart thing either. Too freaky. Costco is bad enough.
If you put together a petition for a code of dress at Walmart, I will sign it and maybe even go sometime in the future!
Cows dress better than your average Wal-Marteer. But it is not just Wal-mart, though that is the worst. Target, Crap-Mart, others: these are places where visible butt-cracks are considered mating calls.
Still, you can't beat Wal-mart prices. So, I make no eye contact, move swiftly, try not to let the "have a good one's" depress me, and add a few dollars to the Don Wood Files Piggy Bank.
i still prefer small provision shops...good personal service..it will be interesting to see babes and hunks in their bare necessities serving in Wal-Mart..a change of image will definitely see increase in customers :)
lmao! Was it this bad in the 80's? I think everything just went in the toilit somewhere in the 90's.
You forgot, leave your pajamas at home, they are not for outer wear! (Especially the ones that have BUNNIES in them!) LOL, love this post.
What is up with those Wal-mart people? Seriously, everyone who shops there is about 100 lbs heavier than the general populace! I was forced to venture into a Wal-mart during the roadtrip out here because I needed some stuff, but normally I prefer NOT to shop there and that whole corporate-culture turns me off.
My husband feels that I am in danger of being forbidden to shop at Wal-Mart... because I don't have several tattoos! Sorry-at my age I'm not about to do that! :)
...well, now, I know Tattoos are a touchy subject with folks (and I don't want to make anyone mad at me) but it DOES seem that the more over wt. a woman is the more tattoos they want, to bring attention to those big upper arms and legs-necks, too-oh-and BACKS!
...More so in Wal-Mart than any place I've been!
I'm in Ocala,Fl. Are Wal-Marts the same all over the country?
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